Confidence, Feeding, Motherhood, Parenting

The #dontjudgejustfeed Campaign

This is a very emotive subject as so many women have such a personal journey when it comes to feeding their baby. I fear a minority of readers were completely missing the point of my previous post, Breast Brigade and more worryingly, misinterpreting my comments as an attack on breastfeeding.

Let’s very quickly set the record straight;

  • Breast milk is the best nutrition for your baby (unless they are allergic/intolerant)
  • Breastfeeders should feel empowered to feed their baby whenever and wherever they choose.
  • Support for breastfeeding mums is so very important and should be encouraged.
  • Education, information and guidance is also vital for any struggling breastfeeder.
  • I acknowledge that successful breastfeeders can have a torrid time too and they should be celebrated in their achievement.

I also feel that the same support and encouragement should be given for people who choose to bottle feed their baby. Hence my last post. It wasn’t a dig, it wasn’t an act of jealously… It was simply a personal story and a message to bottle feeding mums that they are not alone, they shouldn’t feel guilty for their method of feeding and they shouldn’t be judged. I listed potential reasons mums may physically not be able to breastfeed. I was told that I shouldn’t focus on the minority and that messages like mine could ruin a breastfeeders journey.

How on earth could I do that? I didn’t write anything that would convince mothers to give up breastfeeding. I simply acknowledged that’s it’s ok if they do. I’m also focusing on the minority of women who can’t breastfeed because I’m one of them! It’s therefore completely relevant to me and women like me!! I can certainly say that I would have loved to read supportive messages during my bottle feeding journey. And funnily enough, so have many other women who the post was designed for.

I’ve experienced the ‘why can’t you breastfeed?’ questions. I’ve experienced the looks of other women when I got my bottle out in a restaurant, not my breast. I’ve experienced the ‘it’s such a shame you couldn’t pass on your antibodies’ comments. There is judgement out there.

My sole purpose of the post ‘Breast Brigade’ was to try and comfort others who have been in my shoes. I certainly didn’t write it for sympathy, for an anti-breast agenda or to be mocked by other mums online.

Some of the responses have been so personally insulting that I was going to let this topic drop, brush it under the carpet and move on… then I re-read some of the heartfelt messages thanking me for speaking out.

So… I’m now going to encourage women to share their fantastically beautiful photos of them bottle feeding their baby. They should be proud that they have chosen a method of providing nutrition in a way that suits them and their baby. Post your photos on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter  – anywhere! Make sure you use the hashtag #dontjudgejustfeed

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#dontjudgejustfeed

*Please note: I’m not discriminating against breastfeeders by starting this drive. There isn’t anything like this for bottle feeders and there are already weeks dedicated to encouraging breastfeeders to upload their photos.*

And for anyone reading this who is going to try and misquote me or rain on my parade, just remember this statement:

We are on the same side. A side that provides the best nutrition we can give our babies.
Ultimately, we are all just doing our best,  breast or bottle.

Please also remember this:

This is intended to be a positive post to liberate bottle feeding mums. Negative comments on my website or Facebook page will not be acknowledged and will be deleted as soon as I see them.

29 thoughts on “The #dontjudgejustfeed Campaign”

  1. Wow delighted to see this! I actually wanted to start a similar thing with photos of women sharing lovely feeding moments with their bottle fed babies but feared the backlash! So please do ignore any negativity it’s a really lovely thing you are doing for all bottle feeding moms!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’ve always been such a support when it comes to my posts, I truly appreciate it. You regularly post such lovely, encouraging comments and it really means so much X

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m glad it helps. I think it’s lovely when we mothers can support each other. I read some of the negative comments on your last post and I was saddened by them. I think many people, like you said, missed the point of the post; it was never meant in any way to take from breastfeeding or be in a way negative about it. The post was simply to support bottlefeeding mothers in a positive way. I hope you don’t let nagativity or misunderstandings stop you. Your posts are lovely and very much appreciated by other bottle feeding mothers like myself. X

        Liked by 1 person

  2. It’s about time someone stood up for bottle feeding. I am sick and tired of being judged by the breastfeeding brigade because I CHOOSE (just like they have chosen to breastfeed) to bottlefeed. My breasts and my choices concerning them, should be no one’s concern but my own.

    Sorry, very passionate about this. 😯

    Liked by 1 person

  3. There is so much judgement these days – yes fed is best! I bottle fed my daughter, she’s smart bright and funny, she’s a great immune system and rarely sick (touch wood). An awesome kid. Don’t imagine she’d be any different if she was breastfed. Thank you for this.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Well done for doing this. I had to decide between breastfeeding or my own mental health when trying sent me hurtling towards a nervous breakdown and now I am a calmer, happier bottlefeeding mama. I still can’t help but feel inferior when sitting alongside my breastfeeding pals which is silly as they all supported my decision to stop torturing myself! It’s time we stopped feeling negative and comparing ourselves and start celebrating the great work we are ALL doing, growing these tiny humans.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I couldn’t agree more. Some mothers need to quit the negativity, judgements and competitiveness. Let’s start celebrating each other’s beautiful bottle feeding photos on Instagram and Facebook!! Thanks for taking the time to read this and for your lovely comment ❤️

      Like

  5. I think this is a great post to get women thinking. I don’t know why we are so quick to judge each other. There is enough negativity and pressure out there without adding to the burden. I was lucky enough to successfully breastfeed all of my children but that doesn’t mean it was easy. However you choose to feed your baby is your decision and yours only. It is and should be what works for you and your family as they will be the only ones affected by your decision at the end of the day. We shouldn’t have to celebrate breast or bottle feeding but just cherish the moments where we get to have cuddles and feed our children with either breast or bottle. We shouldn’t have to explain why we are doing one or the other. Neither is easy. There are problems that can arise with both and challenge all mothers (and fathers by the way)! Why can it not just be acceptable to support a mother in feeding her child in whatever way works for her? And most importantly to stop judging from on high!!!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. That’s precisedly it Lou, you’ve completely understood what this is all about. Thank you for adding such a value comment to this post. x

      Like

  6. Well done! As long as the child gets the right nutrition it doesnt matter how they are fed. I stand by all and people ahouldnt feel bad if they dont breast feed their child. It doesnt matter. Its your body and you are the one who can decide what you want to do with it. I did breast feed but wished i could have bottle fed sometimes as it wasnt always that easy when you are out and about to stop for as long as the child needs to take to feed. Would have been easier to get a bottle out so you can carry on. No one should feel bad and your lovely little boy is doing great! You should be a proud parent as you have done wonders for rupes! Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Completely agree Shevs, there shouldn’t even be a breast/bottle issue. No one should feel guilty for feeding wherever, whenever, however! Thank you for taking the time to leave such a lovely message. ❤️

      Like

  7. Love this! Have had 4 babies and tried to breast feed them all and just didn’t supply enough milk. Like someone else said for my own sanity I switched to bottle feeding, best thing I could have done. Have 4 healthy happy children with a mum who was mentally able to get through it with the help of a bottle! Never judge it’s what works for you and your baby xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You seriously are one of the best Mummies I know Katie! Thanks for sharing your story and for your Instagram photo – so gorgeous xx

      Like

  8. Like many others who’ve commented I feel incredibly strongly about this topic and could write for a year on my own experience: the struggles, the sadness and guilt, the comments from ‘friends’, the renewal of these feelings when you look up something like stomach bugs on NHS direct to read that ‘breastfed babies are less likely to suffer from stomach bugs’… gee thanks for that! But looking at my happy, healthy, bouncy 3 year old I can see nothing to regret. I’m now expecting baby no. 2 and will try and breastfeed again because I want to but this time around I won’t be feeling guilty if it doesn’t go to plan! We should all be a bit kinder to one another! Thank you for writing such a worthwhile post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Congrats on baby no 2! I hope you have a wonderful – guilt free!!- feeding experience this time round, whichever method suits you both best 😘

      Like

  9. Thank you for this. I have been saying the same thing since I had my first baby and was made to feel an unfit mother because I didn’t breast feed. I never judged anyone for their feeding choice yer I was made to feel like I gad to justify mine time and time again.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It sadly seems to be the case for lots of bottle feeders out there and it’s just so wrong! We all just want healthy, happy babies with full tummies. It really shouldn’t matter how that is achieved! Thank you for your comment and be sure to know that us bottle feeders are awesome mums! 😘

      Like

  10. I am so glad somebody started something like this. I have no problem with mothers breastfeeding. I could not breastfeed due to medical reasons. I have epilepsy and am on quite a high dosage of medication. I had no problems during the pregnancies but ALL the drs involved, the neurologist, the gynecologist and the pediatrician agreed that it would be best for me not te breastfeed as the baby would get some of the medication through the breastmilk and that would not be good. What drove me mad was the amount of judgement out there! Nobody asked ‘why dont you breastfeed?’, it was just the looks, and the comments about hoe the poor baby needs his mothers milk and more. I honestly believe people should me more considered and if you dont know somebody and their reason for not breastfeeding, maybe just keep quiet. Today my boys are 5 and 3, strong healthy and doing good.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Thank you! I tried so hard to breast feed. My milk was not enough. I has read all about people who will try to ‘sabbotage’ my attempt at breastfeeding. Consequently when my baby was borderline suffering failure to thrive and my hubby walked my bedroom door while I was trying to breastfeed and he had a tin of formula in his hand…. I nearly threw the tin at him while screaming about breastfeeding sabotage (I might have been slightly hormonal as well as stressed out about my hungry 2 month old!).
    However eventually I realised that a baby who is fed and has a full tummy is happier than a starving ‘breastfed baby’.
    Yes I cried, yes I felt guilty, yes I still wish I could have had enough milk to feed… but am I happy that my son is now growing at the correct rate? Most definitely!
    Thank you for a while lot of perspective!
    Yours bottle feeding, happy babies!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I’m so delighted to see this post, and know that I am not alone! Everyone has told me I have not done enough to increase my supply, without even knowing the struggles… why would I choose not to give my child nature’s best, as well as save so much money on formula. Let’s just support one another..

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Love love love this. I tried and was ultimately unable to breastfeed my four sons. People who judge should have a look at themselves and try to understand why they feel the need to attack another mother who is just trying her best. Bottle or boob, who the hell cares?? The baby is fed. Mum is happy. The end.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Love love love your comment. I couldn’t agree with you more; fed is best and people who judge need to ask themselves why they feel the need to interfere with a mother’s method of nourishing their baby! Thanks for your support x

      Like

  14. I love this!! This is exactly why I chose to share my reasons for not breastfeeding. So many moms who decide breast is not best for their family are made to feel like less of a mother. ❤️❤️

    Like

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